I remember when I started this blog, I had so much drive in me to talk about the things that concern single people in Nigeria and how to face society and its pressure of marriage. This was in 2014 and I was 28. People caught the bug fast, and soon enough we were all talking about it and making fun of the experiences we all faced.

By 2015, there were 2 stage plays which were hits, I got married and by 2016, I was a solo mother and separated. My whole world changed and even though I still believed in the Single in Gidi brand I struggled to keep up with it.

From the blog, we grew a community, a Facebook group, a few events and then in 2017 and 2018, two more stage productions, again stage hits because the experiences are always something to laugh about, but by 2017, I knew Single in Gidi had to change somehow because the Visioneer (being me) had changed.

I became more focused on impact, letting people know that being single was not the end of the world, especially for those over the age of 30, because our society had set toxic standards of viewing age 30 as the end of life. I cared more about the choices we made as single people and finding happiness for ourselves before finding someone to share it with.

So by Nov 2017, The Inner Nexus Community was born. TIN (as the members like to call it) is a member- only social club strictly for single professionals and entrepreneurs, over the age of 30, in Nigeria. In a little over a year, it has grown with members in Lagos, Port-Harcourt, Abuja, and Accra. Using exclusive events organized in-house and open to only members and recommended guests accompanied by a member, we strive to enhance the lives of our members through high-profile networking and experiences. We have fun !!! but most of all, TIN is changing the narrative and now we have a waiting list of people about to turn 30 looking forward to being a part of this community instead of dreading the fact that they were single. We have members who have seen their lives impacted positively because they are being encouraged to live their best lives. We have built a family.

As for me, I have started sharing my experience again, this time as a podcast and with a totally different vision from what I had with Single in Gidi. The podcast channel is called Single and a Baby, and it can be found on all major podcast apps.

To be honest, I don’t know what next for Single in Gidi, maybe a few events this year, maybe a few posts. Just know that when SIG returns, it won’t be business as usual.

For now, you can follow Single And a Baby on Instagram and subscribe to the podcast.

Oh and Happy New Year,

Mz Gidi.


You meet a girl, let’s call her LOML (Love of my life). You vibe with her on all levels; Sexual attraction ✔ Communication ✔ Friendship ✔ Banter ✔ Intellectual stimulation ✔etc. You guys are a phenomenal duo! RMD and Regina got nothing on you, Will and Jada pale in comparison, Sheldon and Amy? They need to bazinga away!

So you date/hang/chill/whatever until you’re entwined in each other’s lives. I mean, she gets you so it makes sense for her to fit into those hard to reach and mostly hidden areas of your life as you have also fit into hers. Life is good, love is better and LOML, the best.

You’re somewhat successful and the thought of having mini-yous, a home and a wife starts creeping in, you know, the whole “I’m a responsible and respectable man” package; the housewife and 2.5 kids.

You’re still with LOML, however, you realize that LOML doesn’t fit your(read patriarchy’s) idea of what a wife should be, you scored her against the sacred list, handed to you by years of perfectly crafted societal ideals of marriage. She didn’t do well. So you shenk her, give her the usual lines; “it’s not you, it’s me”, “any guy will be lucky to have you”, yenyenyen.

It’s ended, it hurts but “it was the right thing to do” you repeatedly tell yourself, you flash back to her ideologies about marriage and yes it was definitely the right thing to do! She wouldn’t have let you ascend unto your husbandly throne, so you quickly recoup and embark on a search, a search for your perfect idea of a wife or most likely what societal conditioning has told you is a perfect spouse, you don’t search too far because she is that girl who is always around but you never felt a thing for, the one who didn’t make your loins catch fire but defers to you at the slightest provocation, she doesn’t stimulate you but she will take care of the home.
So you make up your mind, he that finds a wife….. You’ve found her, you choose her, life is complete and happily ever after can begin.

The story should end here right? But that’s not where it stops because life can be a Shonda Rhimes script sometimes.

Few months, years down the line…… You now realize that your partner doesn’t get sarcasm, doesn’t get your jokes, doesn’t do it(you can’t explain) for you, no stimulation but still checks all the boxes a partner should have according to society’s manual of marriage, you’re stuck!

You remember LOML, the nights spent talking about the stars, dreams, the ludicrous ingenuity of the shakushaku dance, the ease with which they “got” you. You miss that….. You miss her…..

So, you get in touch, hurray, she’s still single!!! You try to reconnect, a little “hey” here, a little “sup” there before you know, it’s morphed into a “let’s hang”. You meet up, you talk, your heart lights up, you’ve not felt this alive in ages, she still ticks those boxes and you realize you shouldn’t have let her go….

You’re back home and it’s cold.. you perform your societal husbandly duties… Yes, you love your wife and “perfect” life but you need to feel alive….

Have you ever been in this situation? What did you do? Don’t worry you can talk to me about it in the comment section. Do you have an idea on what he should do? Let me know in the comment section.

And yes people, I am back!!! We’ll have a catch-up post soon, but until then let’s not pretend you (yes you) didn’t miss me, tell me how much in the comment section too❤


Last week, Falz introduced us to the Sweet Boy Association, a group of young men who are successful in whatever industry, look good always and are ‘sweet boys’. So many questions have been asked as to if these sweet boys are just demons who are trying too hard to change the Yoruba demon narrative. So let’s take a look at who these sweet boys are and compare them to the Yoruba demons.

  1. Sweet boys are successful – You cannot call yourself a sweet boy if you are not successful in what you do. Whether it be music, like the president Falz or fashion, or corporate law or petroleum engineering, whatever your hand finds to do, you must do it well. Yoruba Demons, on the other hand, is all-inclusive, whether successful or not, a Yoruba demon is a Yoruba demon.
  2. Sweet boys dress well ALWAYS– Mostly because they can afford to, whether it be agbada, kaftan, sweatpants or a three-piece suit, you can never catch a sweet boy looking anyhow. On the other hand, Yoruba demons are known for their uniform, the white or black agbada.
  3. Sweet boys are good looking – This is not in all cases, but most sweet boys are well groomed and in most cases are also members of the #beardgang.
  4. Sweet boys are influential – In addition to being successful, sweet boys are a voice to reckon with in whatever industry which means not all men who are rich or successful can be sweet boys.

So have Yoruba demons rebranded to be called Sweet boys? No, they haven’t.

Sweet boys are the grandfathers of Yoruba demons. Yoruba Demons are learners where you have sweet boys so ladies don’t be fooled.

They are the ones you will go to church to give testimony for, the ones your friends would be slightly jealous of, the ones you’ll be quick to introduce to your family, the ones you’ll lose your senses for and definitely the ones to break your heart in the worst way possible.

Anybody can be a Yoruba demon but not all can be a member of the Sweet Boy Association, when you meet one, you’re going to need extra prayers.



Gbadero couldn’t wait to get out of the office as the weekend rush was about to hit. After many wasted hours in traffic along the Lekki perimeter, he knew the difference ten minutes later than sooner will make could cost him missing out in his Salsa class tonight.

This was his Friday evening fix given that his busy weeks didn’t give him time for his favorite pastime: dancing.

He had been attending this salsa class for about 4 months now and he loved every moment of it, especially the group dances. He wasn’t a bad dancer himself but so far, he hadn’t gelled with any partners. Every Friday was a dash of hope in the direction of positivity and although most of his pairings didn’t click, he had enjoyed the classes so far.

Dashing through the smooth sailing traffic, he could only hope that tonight would be great. He had missed last Fridays, thanks to a work training that went beyond forever. Time flew by briskly and he was already sitting in the dance studios lobby waiting to start.

The atmosphere tonight was bubbly with some new faces and some regulars. Being the introvertish type, he had his Instagram feed to keep him company till 7pm when things kicked off.

He overheard some girls, in a group behind him, teasing their friend about being an ‘SU’ and how she should try to loosen up. She was worrying about dancing so close to a stranger and her friends made good meat of her.

He smiled at their conversation as he could relate it with how his own shyness got in the way when he first got into these classes.

Before long, warmups had begun and he was having fun until the instructor, Chimaka, started pairing up people. Apparently, Chimaka knew a lot of people had settled into pairing up with the same partners week in week out and wanted to shake things up.

Gbadero was hoping it will be Janet from two weeks earlier as she was more experienced and a good teacher. He was already moving, stealthy, closer and closer her way hoping that Chimaka would pair them again.

Alas, Chimaka shouts out ‘Gbadero, please come this way’ as she walks towards this girl he had never seen before. ‘What’s your name again?’ She asked the new girl. ‘Shade’, she replied excitedly as Chimaka brought her closer to Gbadero.

‘Right, Shade this is Gbadero. He will be your partner today. He’s fairly new here too but good enough to help you’ Chimaka continued and joined their hands together.

Gbadero said a shy ‘hi’ and it wasn’t until after she replied that he remembers her to be the new girl being teased earlier.

“She isn’t that bad looking’ Gbadero thought to himself ‘but she’s an SU…. hmmmmm… wo make I just dance jare and catch my own trips’.

Shade was about 5’8 or so, with short braids, full-bodied, no make-up and smelled nice. She had a spark in her eyes and even though she wasn’t saying much, there was a playfulness to her that was infectious.

Gbadero braved up and after the next 5,6,7,8 asks ‘so what do you do?’. ‘I am a lawyer… actually, technically corporate law but more of oil and gas with a splash of international law… you?’. Gbadero replied ‘Not as ghen ghen as you o. I am just an IT guy…. technically, a Windows systems administrator and sometimes the guy everyone’s mum calls when they break their computer’. They both giggled.

‘So why Salsa?’ Shade asked ‘for a guy as big and cuddly as you are, why Salsa?.

‘So you don’t like big guys?’ Gbadero replied.

‘No, I don’t mean it like that. I was saying you don’t find a 6ft plus guy on the chubby side dancing salsa much these days…’ she continued.

‘Ol’ it!’ Gbadero responded as he spun her round ‘it’s all muscle o! You should see me when my clothes go off’.

‘How many girls have you told that lie to, Mr. Gbadero’ Shade asked ‘i bet they all fall for that line?’

‘Ermm, actually, I have other sweet lines but not this one. First time I am trying out this one and I think I’ve failed already’ Gbadero replied.

‘Well, not so quick. I would take you up on that and let me be the judge if it’s all muscle or otherwise’ she replied as they both giggled.

This was going better than Gbadero expected and the more they spoke as they danced, the more he saw the beauty in her. Well, there was obviously a problem. She was an SU and he wasn’t sure if she would be done for a good time. There’s another Friday and another after all, so why rush things he thought.

The classes came to an end. They hugged before they went both back to the changing rooms. Gbadero could still smell her fragrance as he changed his clothes. He could feel himself getting hard and he had to shake himself out of such dead-end thoughts.

Getting into his car, he picked up his phone to check messages and a thud on his window startled him. It was Shade.

‘Hey, Mr. Muscle! I know this may sound awkward but if you’re up for a drink, I don’t live too far away from here and you’re more than welcome to try my special cocktail. You could even show me that muscle if my cocktail passes’, Shade said.

Gbadero was confused. Yes he was single, yes he liked this girl, Yes it was better for him to hang out somewhere still around Lekki till about 10pm as it was just 830pm and traffic will still be tricky going to Mile 2 and Yes, he wanted to taste her cocktail but was she not supposed to be SU?

‘You live not far from here’ he replied incoherently. ‘Yes, about 5 minutes drive. You can follow my car – the blue Honda by the gate over there. Is that okay?’ Shade replied.

‘Sure! Let’s do this totally, Madame Barista!’ Gbadero continued. ‘I’ll be right after you’.

‘Oshey! Don’t get lost. By the way, I like the sound of Madame Barista’

Gbadero saluted as he rolled his windows back up. Wow, this night just gets better. Here’s a pretty girl asking him over. His mind race through all the permutations but then he didn’t have a condom on him and following after her car, he couldn’t buy one. Besides, she might not be down for sex so maybe he shouldn’t think that far.

Driving into her driveway, he was impressed with her condo. It wasn’t ostentatious but you could tell that whoever owns it had taste.

She hurried out of her call to his and helped Gbadero in.

‘Nice house’ Gbadero said ‘It must have cost you a fortune to put this together. I’m working towards moving to Lekki sometime soon too and this has spurred me on’.

‘Actually, it’s not that expensive but I was lucky as someone sold this to me out of desperation. They were relocating under short notice and needed a quick sale. So, there you go…. please have a seat and make yourself comfortable. I’ll be back in a jiffy’ Shade said as she disappeared upstairs.

Gbadero sat on one of the couches in the room. Many racy thoughts ran through his mind as he imagined what sex would be like with Shade. If she smelled as good as she’d been all evening, would she taste equally as good?.

His thoughts were interrupted with Shades footsteps down the stairs. She only had been gone for about 10mins but her return was unexpected. She was in a sheer red silk housecoat with her nipples pointing out.

She bypassed her bar and walked straight in Gbaderos direction with a strut that was super sexy.

‘Hey, Mr. Muscle. I figured I made life easier for you with showing off those muscles’, Shade said as she started untying the black rope around her red robe.

‘Wait! Aren’t we moving too quickly here? What happened to that drink you…’ Gbadero replied nervously. Shade had opened her robe and this made him lose his train of thoughts.

He saw her in her nude form and his lust heightened to the utmost level. He tried to get up but she pushed him right back.

‘Easy, Tiger, Easy. I promised you a drink, didn’t I? That first ‘ Shade continued, walking away to the bar and flicking her little red robe to reveal more of a rotund ass.

‘Fuck!’ Gbadero thought. This must be his lucky night in a few months of inactivity. The imagery of her full frontal – huge brown areolas and full breasts; her well-groomed bush; tiger marks around her firm athletic thighs and the birthmark around her curvy waist.

He could imagine her legs wrapped around him already. He wanted to taste her already and feel her pussy juices on his tongue. He had stiffened up now and didn’t know if it was appropriate to bring out his dick. He didn’t want to appear desperate or jump to conclusions. What if that was just an accident or a test? He adjusted himself back and reached for a small backrest nearby to conceal his excitement.

Shade was returning now with two drinks in hand. There was a mischievous smirk on her face as she handed the drink to Gbadero and sat beside him Budda style. She waited for him to sip on her cocktail with rapt attention.

‘What do you think?’ she asked ‘Expectation met’?

Gbadero looked at her dismissively and downed everything in one full sweep. ‘The proof is in the pudding… they say… I say the pudding went down smooth and well’ Gbadero replied to a smiling Shade who quickly copied Gbadero and downed hers too.

‘Now that that’s out of the way, it’s time to show me that muscle, Mr. Muscle’ Shade replied as she put her glass away.

‘No, no, no need to get up’, she continued as Gbadero was about to stand up. ‘You’ve been up all evening. Just take that shirt off and let me do the judging’ she continued as she stood and knelt in between his open legs.

Gbadero flung his shirt and singlet open faster than he normally would, excited about where all this could lead.

‘So what do you think Madame Barista’? he asked feeling all content with himself. ‘I gave myself away a bit after my last breakup two months ago but…’

Shade put her finger on his lips to hush him. ‘I’ve seen better muscles but I don’t mind tonight. I like you – that’s all that counts’ she replied ‘Has anyone told you before that you talk too much sometimes? Just relax and let me show you something that can inspire you to work on those muscles even better’.

She kissed his bare chest and sucked on his left nipple. She looked up to his face, as if to seek his approval, and started kissing him again. He tried to touch her face but she smacked his hand away and continued kissing his chest, rubbing her hands on his thighs. His phallus was bursting to be released from his jeans now.

She stopped again to make eye contact. ‘Do you want me to be a bad girl for you tonight Papi?’ she asked. Gbadero moaned out as he said the faintest yes. ‘Louder Papi’ she replied back to him and as he shouted more words and moaned sounds of affirmative surrender, she brought out his dick.

It was slightly curved with girth and veiny ridges. He was normally groomed with stubble around his pubic area and she started working her lips on his shaft, sucking his balls and performing magical fellatio.

Gbaderos entire body was electrified. Could this be real? This is one of the most beautiful and intelligent girls he had ever met in less than 3 hours of meeting her, she is already turning his world upside down without his trying too hard.

She had a special way of sucking on his dick that made it hard for him to focus on his thoughts and alas, just about three minutes into her intense blowjob, Gbadero cums with a fury all over her face and housecoat.

Apologetically, he tried to get up.

‘I’m so sorry. It’s about three months now’ he tried to explain. ‘I didn’t know where that came from and I am so embarrassed….’

She interrupted him again by placing her wet and messy finger on his lips.

‘it’s okay. I understand’ She replied and licked off all the semen from her face and clothing. ‘Now that you’ve messed up my body and cut my work short, I have to punish you’. She stood up to the side the couch, pushed Gbadero till his back was on the couch fully, pulled off his jeans and boxer and removed her robe.

It was such a glorious sight to Gbadero as he body swayed in the silhouette of the dim light above her. Her bosoms moved as though to music as she slowly climbed on top of him, sitting astride his bare chest.

‘Every Queen needs a throne Papi’ She continued. ‘Are you ready to make your face my throne?’ She asked to which Gbadero grabbed her by the thigh as though she was a child and sat her vagina on his face.

It was warm and wet. He let his tongue do the work as he circled her clitoris, making shapes around her labia and delighting her as her legs twitched, shook and moved haphazardly.

Her breathing became deeper and more intense as she also kept grabbing his head and pushing his face deeper into her. She was moaning more and with her free hand, found Gbaderos other hand to push onto her bum.

He squeezed her buttock hard, caressed it and continued to delight her as he worked his tongue. Time seemed to not matter anymore but Gbadero only realized how long he had been doing this for when his 10pm alarm went off from his phone, tucked away in his jeans.

Distracting a frenzied Shade for a moment, she turned around and pushed herself away to stand up from his face.

‘You’re hard again Papi, fuck me like you want to push me’ she continued as she grabbed a condom from her housecoat. She strapped him rapidly with one and leaned into the other chair with her ass pushed out.

Gbadero feeling all proud of himself for being able to get erect again pushed his entire shaft in slowly into her pussy. She sighed with a mix of pain and excitement as he pushed in.

‘Are you okay Baby’ he asked to gauge how much of himself he would have to give to her.

‘You talk too much man… let that dick do the talking. Shut up and fuck me hard’ She yelled back at him.

Gbadero didn’t disappoint. He thrust harder than he had ever done in his entire life. He would go in rhythms of 8-10 quick thrusts then slow down to 4-5 thrusts then go more again, caressing her back and manhandling her ass from time to time. The view was glorious as her butterfly spread right in front of him.

It was good that he had cum before as he was going to go until she begged him to stop.

As he was thinking these thoughts and feeling accomplished to the sounds of her moans, screams and incoherent verbiage, she pulled herself aside and said ‘sit, sit, sit on that couch over there – let me ride this dick’

Gbadero obliged quickly and she slowly sat on that dick pulling his head into her face so that he could look into her eyes as she mounted him. He gave a sigh of joy as she went all in again and she started grinding hard on his dick.

Gbadero loved it so much as it wasn’t much of a ride nor was it a grind. It was as though she was dancing to some undisclosed music in her mind.

His toes were curling as she sent cosmic energies all over his body; Her eyes were all rolled up as she yelled out vulgarities Gbadero didn’t expect to even come from her but he was loving every moment of it.

Suddenly, started screaming repeatedly ‘I’m cumming’. It was the sexiest sound Gbadero had heard in a long time and as she orgasm-ed wildly, with her arms wrapped tightly around Gbaderos neck and her body gyrating profusely, Gbadero felt himself cum in the condom too.

It was a beautiful experience followed by a moment of silence as she stayed in his embrace. She came up for air and kissed him so passionately, you could have assumed she would never see him again.

‘You were amazing’ Gbadero said as she stopped kissing him. ‘In fact, you are amazing. This has been the most amazing sex I’ve ever had in ages’ he continued.

She grabbed his face again starting into his eyes. ‘You weren’t bad too yourself Mr. Can I make you a drink again to reward you for taking me places I’ve not been in ages?’ she asked.

Gbadero obliged and she got up wiggling her ass as she cat-walked away from him to the bar.

‘Can I ask you something’ Gbadero asked.

‘Sure’ she replied from across the room.

‘Was it not you your friends called SU earlier today at the dance studio, Where did an SU learn your kinda tricks?’

‘like I said before, has anyone ever told you, you talk too much? better shut up before I come and deal with that preeeeq again’ she said bursting into a laugh.

‘You don’t have to go home tonight, if you don’t want. I live alone and you can start out in the morning’ she continued. ‘You could show me more things that this Papi can do to this pussy’ she said as she came out with another drink and grabbing herself thug style.

They both chuckle and the light went off. It was time to switch over her generator. She excused herself to go change and get her gate-man to change over.

Gbadero sat there wondering how his lucky stars must have aligned the right way tonight. He hadn’t had this much fun in a long time especially after being with Lola for five years to no fruitful end.

He was ready to do this again all night long and then the lights came back on.

‘It’s game on tonight’ he muttered under his breath as he started rubbing his dick again.

(Gbadero returns with more adventures).



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“Celebrity Dinner” event to be held on 10th August, 2018 from 6PM onwards. It’s a free buffet dinner with a 10% discount for any guest coming in with you. The purpose of the event is to raise some funds for our chosen charity institution (Children Living with Cancer Foundation) which has touched our hearts after seeing the cancer patients fighting for their lives which a very few of us are aware of. We will be serving a full American/Nigerian dinner course prepared by our professional chefs and tons of drinks which can surely make your night enjoyable. For more details and sponsorship kindly contact us at +234 802 609 5962 or email us at smokeybonessf@gmail.com