Miss Gidi’s guidelines to being a Gidi Hot Babe

It is a well-known fact that Lagos has a lot of beautiful women either by genetics or by acquisition,; no matter how ‘hot’ you think you are, there’s always someone hotter. If you think you have curves, then you will meet someone curvier or maybe you think your claim to fame are your long, chocolate legs wellll you will soon find that you are not alone on that wall of fame. (#teamlonglegs).

I guess that’s general knowledge for all beautiful women but I’m sure you want to know what makes a gidi hot babe so different from the others?

You don’t? Well I am telling you anyway

Being a Gidi hot babe is not easy, to be honest, some of us have tried and failed in this matter because it takes a lot to be that ‘established’ kind of girl (or we just have other priorities in life). But I do understand that a lot of other women are curious to know how to become one because let’s be real, this city has a lot of competition and you have to stand out in whatever way you can. So here are the guidelines of being a Gidi Hot Babe:

  • You must be active on social media – specifically Instagram. I mean that’s like the easiest way to show off your God-given/acquired beauty. There are additional rules to this, like having only fully made up pictures, not throwing back to more than 3 years (except cute baby pictures), having at least 10 bikini shots and so on
  • You must have celebrity friends – like how else will you be popular if you don’t have other famous people who have worked hard for you to latch on?
  • You must never admit to knowing commoners (in public) – so that friend you were once close to, that’s not famous? You don’t know him/her in public settings. You must know how to pretend like you didn’t see them and then act surprised but not too surprised when they say hi so you are not confused as being fake.
  • You never say HI/HELLO first – Unless of course it’s a celebrity that can help you up the ladder
  • You must be a snob – as a Gidi hot babe, you can’t be talking to anyone you see na? learn to have a straight face when people ‘below’ you try to talk to you.
  • You must be busy or fake being busy – especially at events so BBM/Whatsapp chatting at weddings and parties is totally allowed for a woman of your calibre because you will be ‘busy’
  • You must have an accent – preferably American or British
  • You must use celebrity hair stylists/fashion designers/makeup artists and salons – as a Gidi hot babe, you only go for the expensive and popular …don’t forget to take a picture and mention on Instagram
  • You must have everything expensive – shoes, bags, cell phones, outfits, exotic trips, spa treatments e.t.c. As a gidi hot babe you must be seen as someone who is ‘chopping life’. Are you wondering how you can get all of these? Easy! You don’t spend your money or you can save towards it (but never admit to saving)…oh and remember to post it on Instagram too (you may want to skip the part of who gave it to you though so you are not confused as being a ‘run’s girl’)
  • You must be HOT – because none of this matters if you do not have the right foundation as a ‘hot babe’

So there you have it, Miss Gidi’s guidelines to being a Gidi Hot Babe

Shout out to all the Gidi Hot babes I see doing absolutely nothing except being ‘hot’ because that in itself is a lot of work and y’all need some recognition for your hardwork.

Till we meet again

Love

Before I forget, it’s important you have a job or a business, something to show that you have other priorities.

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4 thoughts on “Miss Gidi’s guidelines to being a Gidi Hot Babe

  1. lol @ “You never say HI/HELLO first”. I am definitely guilty of this, although not the way you mean it sha. Some peeps are straight up annoying acting like they don’t see you walk by or attempt to engage them in convos. When I see them acting like I’m not there, I sharply switch lanes and erase them from my sight. I sometimes go as far as chatting up someone they are with in juicy conversations, just to dare them a little. It’s always funny when the same snob then tries hard to act like she is not trying to hear the conversation. Idiot. The same person would then act uber friendly when I am the only one she knows at an event and tries to melt into my circle for the night. Hi ko, hello ni.

    Like

  2. The Lord be with them as they maintain their ACQUIRED / generic beauty! Hehehehe
    Reading the list made me dizzy as I’m far away from making the top Gidi babes list 😛
    You forgot to add “ must have frequent vacations/ trips abroad ; Dubai, London and America being must-go places

    Like

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