FORKED TONGUE

What are you doing up?

I asked Rolayo when I saw her status change. It was 01:42.

After the meeting at the wedding Rolayo and I kept in touch. It was almost as if two years had not passed since we last bonded.

My brother, na sleep no gree catch me o.

Welcome to Insomniacs Anonymous. Does this happen often? I asked her.

Well, I have been finding it hard to sleep for about a week now. I go watch tv reach midnight, take hot drink and then sleep go begin catch me, but once my body touch bed peren, na so the sleep go disappear. Come see as your sister go dey shine eye till day go break.

She replied.

Mehn, this can’t be funny. I get bouts of insomnia from time to time, but I find that sharing my bed with someone helps. Like, when my girlfriend comes around, I sleep through the night. When I’m by myself, I’ll pro’ly sleep at 9, wake at midnight, and not sleep again till 4 before waking up at 5am.

I’m just tired, Rolayo typed. I have tried different things to help me sleep, but whosai. Not music, not working myself to exhaustion during the day nothing.

No bobos? I asked her.

Hmmm… my brother that matter get as e be.

How you mean? I was curious.

There’s bros o, but he’s not always in town. We don’t see that often.

I could hear the sadness in that text and it made me feel wan kain, like I was throwing my relationship in her face.

Na to find at least cuddle buddy be that nau. I said.

Which one be cuddle buddy?

Someone to share your bed. I don’t necessarily mean sexually o, I quickly added. Just someone to hold you and cuddle with on cold lonely nights. Better if it’s someone you feel comfortable with. It’s been known to work.

Hian! Where I go come find cuddle buddy? Dem dey sell am for Shoprite?

Rolayo abeg no wound me with laughter.

Ah, na true nau. Very valid question.

It was when I started awake that I realised that I had dozed off. Her last message was twenty minutes ago.

Are you there? I asked. Sorry I dozed off.

It was not until the following morning that she replied me.

When I didn’t reply she Skyped with a friend of hers in The Abroad. He asked her to set her laptop down and the bed and lie there while they talked, and that was how she was when she woke up and saw my messages.

Two days later we were both up at night and the talk came back to cuddle buddies.

In case you dey find cuddle buddy. I dey queue o. #JustSaying.

Yeye boi. Came her reply.

When I finally visited her after weeks of her inviting me to come and know her place, I was about to leave when we heard the first clap of thunder.

“Na rain be that?” I asked.

“No, I no tink so.”

I walked to the window and pulled back the curtain and giant drops of rain beat against the pane. The staccato rhythm soon changed as it became a torrential downpour.

“Shit.” I cursed.

“What is it? Somewhere you have to be?”

“Nah, not really.” I replied. “Just thinking about the crazy traffic. I’m going to have to face tonight,”

“Must you go? I have two spare rooms. And then there’s my bed – if you’re not afraid to share it.”

“I kuku don’t mind sharing your bed. As long as you won’t mind me snoring.” I said.

“Snoring bawo? Wo, if you snore peren, I’ll kick you out of the bed.” she threatened.

That night as we lay in bed and talked, I was trying to work on an article I had to submit to a friend who asked me to write something for him.

“I’m tired jare,” she gave an exaggerated yawn and stretched. “I think I’ll turn in for the night.”

“Okay then,” I said.

She squirmed and shifted till she was nestled under the covers, her back turned to me.

I carried on working on the piece I was writing.

“Bobo?”

“Ehn?”

“Are you still working on that piece?”

“Yes.”

“Will you drop that computer right now and hold me!”

I wanted to argue, to defy her, but the little boy in me mumbled “okay” before setting the laptop on the bedside drawer, turn over sideways and press against her till we were spooning, put one hand over her side and tucked it under her breasts.

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3 thoughts on “FORKED TONGUE

  1. The pidgin element just makes me smile. #insomniacsUnite Ahuuu!!!
    Bobo don turn cuddle-buddy, e don dey touch sontin 😛
    Cuddling when it’s raining outside is just *sigh*

    The concept of cuddle-buddy is great but I think it comes with a big bag of “feelings”.
    We await the next episode 🙂

    Like

  2. bad things are about to happen. Bobo too likes wahala, why would you play with fire by offering someone to ‘platonically’ cuddle? Too much close contact.

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  3. Ermmm… This cuddle buddy offer was meant only as a joke. it was not supposed to happen like that. I don’t even know how it happened. Next week sha, we go know.

    Like

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