HEDGING BETS

Block Brown Sugar? Blocked contacts will no longer be able to call or send you messages.

I hesitated.

Cancel.

– There’s a program in Lagos for single professionals that you may like. Here’s the link, see if it’s something you’ll like to attend.

I attached a link to ProConnect, hit send, and then blocked her.

The next morning at work my phone rang. The number didn’t look familiar, and neither did the caller’s voice.

“Hello, good morning ma’am.”

“It’s me.”

“Sorry?”

“Bobo, it’s me.”

She didn’t have to say her name. Brown Sugar.

“Hey, how’re you?”

“I just read your blog.”

Oh shit.

“So you used our conversation, everything I told you, in your blog?”

“It’s not my blog, it’s a friend’s blog and I write for her.” I said, as if the technicality mattered.

“Because what I write about is basically my life, my friends find themselves subjects of my research.”

Stop talking.

“You’re a horrible person, and I don’t want to talk to you ever again.”

“See…” I heard a click, and she was gone.

I slumped back in my seat, dragging my hands down my face.

“What is it again Bobo?” Osime asked.

Again?” I asked. “If someone hears you now they’ll think my wahala is plenty,” I smiled at her.

“Sorry oh.”

“It’s woman palaver, but I’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.”

– Guys, you won’t believe what just happened. So I sent Brown Sugar a link to ProConnect yesterday. The plan was for her to go on the blog and check out the details, hopefully she’d find a guy there. What I didn’t factor in was that she would read beyond the post the link took her too. Worst part – or best part – depending, is that I published a post yesterday evening and I clean forgot.

– See gbege! Wale said.

– Gbege no be small. She called me this morning and said she didn’t want to talk to me ever again.

– That works for you nau, Scar said. I think I should start a blog purely for burning bridges.

– Why are you foolitch like this? I asked him.

– Bobo that means you’re a marked man. When we go out I’ll remember to stand far from you.

– What? I was confused.

– Ah, I should stand with you so that when she fingers you to her boys, I’ll chop beating with you?

– Fingers? Hmmm… *phases out of chatroom* Phantom said.

– *smh* better come back here.

– Bobo you know she will come back for you, right? Wale asked.

– Nah men, bridge successfully burned.

– You think? Let’s wait and see.

– She either wants you so much more now, or she completely hates you. Both extremes of emotion that need to be expressed and can land her in your bed sometime in the future.

– The grey areas, Scar said.

– Grey’s anatomy -__-

Before I closed for work, I got a mail notifying me of a training in Abuja scheduled for the next week.

“Hey Osime, see this mail I got about a training in Abuja, did you get it too?” I asked.

“What mail? Let me see… Nah,” she said, “I’m not scheduled for it.”

“Okay. I was hoping we’d be going together, but don’t worry, I’ll have enough fun for both of us, and tell you about it.”

“Bobo the training isn’t till Monday…”

“Ehn, but I’ll be leaving town on Sunday.”

“You still have two working days till then. I’ll make sure you do more than your share of work before you leave.”

“Na so.”

***

– Hey you

– Hello stranger

– You still in Abuja?

– Yea

– How’ve you been?

– So so

– Maybe I’ll finally see you next week. A movie perhaps.

– You in Abuja?

– Should be by Monday.

– Cool

– I’ll keep you posted

– Alright then.

***

Brrr… Brrr…

I listened to the phone ring.

“Hello?” an out of breath voice answered.

“I love your new tips.”

“Do you really?”

“I loooove them. Blonde tips suit you.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere.”

“Guess where it’s bringing me?”

“Please say Abuja.”

“As long as I live to see Monday, I should wake up in Abuja.”

“When do you arrive?”

“Sunday evening.”

“Yay. I’m super excited. What are you coming to Abuja for? How long will you be in town? Have you made plans for your trip?”

“I’ll confirm all of that to you as soon as I get the full details, but I should be in Abuja for a week.”

***

– Hey, I see you have the same struggle as me

– huh?

– Your DP. These days I’m stuck on what to write.

– Ah, you and me both.

– How’ve you been tho?

– I’ve stopped referring to myself as a writer. The writer’s block has been going on for too long.

– How are you dealing with the fuel situation?

– I think it’s a little more severe in Lagos.

– Lucky y’all.

– I’ll be in Abuja in a couple days, maybe I’ll see you then.

– Let me know when you get in and we’ll work out whatever.

– Cool.

With three possible dates lined up, I knew my stay in Abuja was not going to be boring. Sunday could not come soon enough.

My flight was for 2 o’clock on Sunday afternoon, but I was at the airport by 11:30. I walked to the check-in counter, my mind already in Abuja. When the check-in agent told me my flight had been cancelled, it took me a moment to understand what she was saying.

“No,” I told her, “I’m on the 2pm flight.”

“Yes sir, the flight has been cancelled.”

“What time is your next flight?”

“Go up there,” she pointed to their ticket desk, “and reschedule your flight.”

– Flight’s a little delayed. Let you know when I get in.

When the aircraft door finally shut at 8:52pm, I was too exhausted to fret. I just wanted to get to the hotel and sleep.


 

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