I am starting 2016 over again today because January was a 31 days free trial, so it is only fair.
But January sha! January has been quite an entertaining month for world in general, and particularly more fun for the federal republic of social media drama; the Nigerian chapter. From Olamide and Don-Jazzy sharing Lagos into mainland and Island to, Donald Trump disgraceful rants, Will Smith’s wife Oscar snubbing meltdown to Ice Prince and his bae that has a bae, #WasteHisTime2016, Kanye, Wiz and Amber Rose to the most recent face of the Yoruba demons; the muffins being asked to leave a wedding.
I know what you are thinking “Imarose cannot spell Yoruba names but no darlings; I just couldn’t be bothered with grown ass men who keep referring to their grandfather’s legacy in Ondo state who used to associate with the great Awolowo. Those kids are tripping!
Sorry but not sorry, I can’t take such men seriously, like how are you going to be Instagram rich and cannot pinpoint what you do for a living. To add insult unto injury, be giving relationship nuggets to women and straight up went crazy cursing out a lady on social media.
If you didn’t hear about the Gbemi’s innocent sub of two socialite brothers in Lagos that hustle invites to prominent events and high society weddings in Lagos, then you need to be fined. But just in-case you are the only Jew in Jerusalem, let me narrate the story.
So Gbemi who is actually about the only radio presenter I actually really like; mostly because she is not into that acquired accent of a thing. The beats FM presenter tweeted a sub and the owners of the subs (muffin brothers) quickly came out and caught their subs. Yes I didn’t misspell their name, I just couldn’t be bother to waste my alphabet on those sorry excuse of men, aint nobody have time for the muffins.
But nobody would have prepared the social media republic for what the muffins did next. Next thing I know, someone called me from London by 11pm to go on twitter that some insane “boys” whose only relevance in life is the history of their grandfather who nobody knows about or care were disgracing themselves on social media.
As a gist lover, sleep cleared. Oh the things I read, those men who are well over their 30s wrote made my heart ache for Gbemi. I couldn’t believe, a man in 2016 could say such things about a woman, so publicly. After they calmed down, they offered a very wet-apology not to Gbemi but to the ‘public’, and to think one of these grown boys happens to be married made me feel sorry for the supposed wife.
What I liked about the whole thing was Gbemi ignoring their stupidity. Social media republic’s capital Twitter-sphere were busy debating whether or not the muffins will actually still go to the wedding after all the drama. Lo and behold, these boys actually went to the wedding, decked in their 20 yards of Yoruba demon uniform, with their own personal mopol, only to get there and were asked to leave, cheiiiiii, what can they do to redeem themselves here?..well at least their Instagram profiles are now private.
It was good to know that a fellow woman can look out for her friend when faced with such madness. I know how one former friend threw me under the bus because of her boyfriend’s friend who was rude and insulting to me. So shout out to Mrs Demuren and also to the families for not tolerating nonsense at such a joyous occasion.
Any friend, boyfriend or husband who allows others to make fun of, insult or mock their boo’s friends needs to learn from #TSquared2016.
Friendship is not by mouth, it is by respect for other people’s pain and standing up for what is right.
After all that drama in January, I’m curious to know what February has for a single girl in this Lagos… #BaeforValentine2016